Weekly Ketchup 39 - Three Things

First thing: Late last week, there was a typhoon. Been there, done that.
Along with the rising flood waters came the sudden swelling of my lower lip. I suspect it was either the pin prick of a sore I noticed a couple of nights before (either I bit on it or an insect did) or the unsanitary way I shaved that part of my face just the day before (yeah, it's a thing). Either way, it was itchy, heavy, and painful and, once again, another medical emergency that I couldn't afford to have at the moment.
Both unfortunate circumstances threw a wrench at last weekend plans, which should've included Play Like A Pirate Day, the Manila International Book Fair, and game night with a bunch of geek friends. I did see a doctor when the sky cleared up and was prescribed an antibiotic. Thankfully, no surgery or needles were required.
While I spent the entire weekend feeling feverish (maybe my body's reaction to the rather strong medication), the rest of the work week was just me going through my normal daily routine, except with a comically large lower lip (and a bit of puss). Thankfully, the damn thing has healed now and life is back to normal.

I was glad that I didn't have to see people; then I snapped this selfie.

Second thing: I received an unexpected but very welcome call last Monday from someone I haven't heard from in a couple of years. The nature of our conversation has immediate ramifications for my plans to leave. It may derail them, in fact. On one hand, I don't want months of planning to unravel. On the other, the opportunity offered to me happens only once in a lifetime. Sorry if I'm being vague but I've been sworn to secrecy but I'm sharing a bit of it here because I kinda wanna track the progression of this story as well, Hopefully, I get to dedicate an entry to this situation in the coming weeks.
Right now, I'm trying to focus on the solution aka to have my cake and eat it too. It's a dilemma, to be sure, but I find that focusing on the problem is just gonna weigh me down (like that time). But this new development is gonna involve plenty of sacrifices on my part but, hopefully, it forces me to grow and evolve. So challenge accepted (I guess?)

Lastly, this past week is memorable for the number of pitchforks slung. I agree that rape is not funny and leashing a performer is distasteful (notice I did not say "female"). However, the number of opinions and discussions surrounding both incidents are already staggering plus I already spent last week on an overarching ramble about another societal issue so I'm not gonna get into them here. I will just point out three things:
a) The irony of timing as both issues went viral at the same time that Emma Watson's speech at the United Nations did.
b) Watson, of course, emphasized the responsibility of males to take up the feminist cause as well. The thing is: As someone whose earliest memories happened during the time of a female president; whose parental figures were my grandmother, my mom, and my aunt; whose earliest comic heroes were the X-men and their powerful female characters; and who has worked with more female bosses, the idea that women are inferior in any way have always been alien to me. While that may not mean much coming from a guy with a queer identity, I look at my closest male friends who've had a traditional hetero-normative upbringing and I think we see women the same way. Must be a geek thing.
c) I do wonder: If rape did not exist or if it wasn't a prevalent crime, would joking about it be simply cathartic? After all, Greek dramas were all sprung from exploring aspects of the human experience that were not realized at the time. Similarly, if male patriarchy or slavery were figments of our imagination, would the image of a man holding a woman on a leash just mean to satisfy our curiosity? And to tie this matter off with last week's conundrums: If it had been a black woman holding a Filipino man (two cultures with no common histories) on a leash, can it just be art?

Obviously, I didn't really see a female being ensnared by the patriarchy. I just saw another human being and it is disturbing (but was it also cathartic?), especially since the concept did not call for it. Writing this just now made me realize I wasn't as offended by the imagery as my friends were.

Just like racial and cultural issues, matters about sex, gender, and representation are important to me not just as a person but also as a would-be creator. Unfortunately, our lot in life is that we're born either one or the other, so the "write what you know" principle is harder to follow when you're talking about the opposite sex or people of other cultures so it helps to collaborate as well as to keep the dialog open.
In the age of social media, however, there is the added challenge of sifting through wanton activism and knee-jerk reactions to get to little nuggets of enlightened opinions. Thankfully, there is an abundance of smart people in my life to mine them from.

Weekly Ketchup 38 - Racial Ramblings

As soon as I finished last week's catch-up, I immediately had an idea what this week's blog was gonna be about since the thought weighed heavily on my head days after posting it.

When I made the jump from talking about 300: Rise of an Empire to the Islamic State, I did not mean to imply that modern-day Persians (aka the Turks and the Iranians) are in anyway related to the terrorist group. I actually had to research about the difference between Persian and Arabian people because for the longest time, and I'm sure I'm not the only one guilty of this, I thought they were one and the same mainly because of geography and religion. I guess it's the same how some people can't differentiate between Koreans and Chinese (or even Japanese) and assume that the cultures are interchangeable. This doesn't necessarily mean that lumping unrelated peoples together is racist but I do understand how the ignorance can be offensive, regardless of the intent.

Though I wonder why everyone else but white people seem quick to cry "racist stereotyping". Since I talked about my love of the fantasy genre last week, allow me to make examples of elves (a Norse creature) and satyrs (a Greek creature) or, more similarly, fairies and nymphs being lumped together in games and books. Why is noone crying foul over the homogenization of European culture?

I also wonder: People were up in arms when Ziyi Zhang, a Chinese woman, was cast as the lead in Memoirs of a Geisha but I don't remember a single protest raised against the "Indianization" of the Fire Nation, which had a more Japanese inspiration in the cartoons, in "The Last Airbender". The latter, of course, had bigger problems when it was accused of white-washing peoples that had distinctively Inuit and Chinese origins.

Of course, the difference between "Geisha" and "Last Airbender" was that the former was explicitly set in Japan - a real location - whereas the former was set in a fictional world, so I can maybe give the producers a little leeway when it comes to reinterpreting the source material for the big screen to appeal to a wider domestic audience (same thing that happened with the Dragonball movie).

I admit I'm also given to a bit of bias. I really don't mind if a traditionally white character gets made over into a totally different race in a reinterpreted adaptation. Michael Clark Duncan as the Kingpin? Sold! Fan Bing Bing as Blink? Loved it! Michael B. Jordan as the Human Torch? Well, let's see how this goes but I'm open. There really isn't much room to wiggle here since these are characters that have been canonically illustrated as white people with a back history set in an idealized "real" world that specifically establishes such but I'm still all for it! But hell will be raised if War Machine or the Falcon were depicted as white.

That being said, I do wonder if a reinterpretation of "The Lord of the Rings" or "A Song of Ice and Fire" set in a more Asian-inspired fictional world, going directly against the authors' visions, would work? I wonder if I would be open to the idea. Right now, I'm a little curious about it as that sounds like an awesome production, travesty to the source material aside.

Admittedly, the modes of pop culture I consume - fantasy novels, comics, cartoons, even the CGI-laden summer blockbusters, and games (possibly) are all constructs of white people's imaginations, so it makes sense that some of the early works, even some of the current ones, in those genre were about them. I guess noone's crying foul about the homogenization of European cultures because the perpetrators are themselves white. We, as non-white consumers, cannot feign ignorance either because our education system has been Euro-centric from the get-go, which is why it's easier for us to accept the Greeks as heroes and the Persians as villains. Heck, I knew more about Greek mythology from high school than I ever did about Filipino lores. And no, it can't be that empire-building just leaves a bad taste in our mouth because the Romans and Alexander had empires and are venerated for it.

Why all this matters to me has to do with what I intend to leave in this world as my life's work: A fantasy epic that has gods, monsters, magic, heroes, and all sorts of creatures. One of the original ideas for the story was a desert-dwelling, moon-worshipping tribe of villainous ogres, which was immediately dropped after 9/11. I also wanted to present a human race that was far more diverse than what JRR Tolkien had in his legendarium, so I had main characters that resembled and were based on American Indians, Chinese, and Persian peoples. Meanwhile, the human halves of my humanoid creatures (aka harpies and minotaurs) are black. And yet my main character was a white boy. Even the gods I imagined then were Greek-inspired so they were naturally white.

As time wore on and my knowledge of the real world increased and deepened, the fictional world I have in my head also evolved, albeit somewhat conflictingly. The gods are no longer white humans but magical creatures instead. I have now added more humans into the world, including those based on the East Indians and the Africans. All of them inhabiting the same world as elves, fairies, djinns, dragons, and vampires! I feel like in the effort to not be racially biased, I have created this rather colorful but convoluted world and lost track of the story!

Another question that have plagued me in recent years was whether to write my Filipino ancestry into the story. After all, Tolkien drew much inspiration from his Irish ancestry for his Hobbits. I tried to rewrite the story in this vein when I joined NaNoWriMo a few years ago but I ended up with a totally different story than I originally intended! This got me thinking: Regardless of whether I find a large enough audience, should I bear the responsibility of bringing my world into this genre that I love and aspire to participate in?

On a related story: This past week, some of my friends from UP have been accusing the NU Pep Squad (and other squads) of "cultural misappropriation" in their choice of themes following last week's cheerdancing competition for which the UP Pep Squad, despite their strong advocacy theme, placed second. While I don't doubt my friends' objectivity about the matter, it can't be helped to taste bitterness in their objections. The same can be said about me expressing this observation coming from the school that placed third.

Now all was on my mind a few days ago when I thought: Maybe the only way my work would not come of as Euro-centric, racist, ignorant, culturally misappropriated and not worry about representing my ethnicity was to instead create a whole new race of humans that are far removed what exists now - like people gray skins with blue hair. I can take what little tidbits about real cultures however it would serve the story. How cool would that be to have samurai-like warriors headquartered in a pyramid, for example?

Of course, I'm rambling about a piece of work that doesn't exist yet but as my life's work, I need to really think hard about these things and educate myself.

Anyway, I'm currently feverish, fighting off a lip infection, so I apologize if this week's edition isn't studded with links and images. I'll update when I feel better, hopefully this coming week.

Weekly Ketchup 37 - Flight of Fantasy

Geekdom is a vast realm of varied interests and I have long cast my lot with fantasy and mythology. Last week alone, I found myself gorging on as much magic and fantasy as I can handle - and somehow found some connections between my hobbies, current events, and existentialist questions.

First things first: I finished the entire second book of Avatar: The Legend of Korra and, while not awful, it just didn't quite capture my imagination as much as Legend of Aang did. Its world of automobiles, "movers", mechas, etc. were just alien to me. In fact, the only episodes I fully enjoyed were the saga of Wan (spin-off please?). I would've appreciated the world better if bending somehow explained the new technologies. That being said, I'm sure still gonna follow book three.

Wan/Raava vs. Vaatu
(Source)

On the gaming front, I'm still on Warlords Battlecry 2 and Age of Wonders 2 (yeah, it takes a while). I've been playing WB2 on a daily basis since Geekstractions and I've now conquered three quarters of the world (with a sad win-loss record of 1:2). Meanwhile, I've been spending my free Saturdays on AoW2, playing a couple of really long levels at a time, and is now one level away from finishing the game! Yay me!

Book-wise, I started Daniel Arenson's Firefly Island. I didn't remember the premise of the book and why I bought it so I went into blindly, not certain if I liked it a couple of chapters in. But the more I unraveled Arenson's world, I became so much more invested that I plowed through about eight chapters last Saturday! The narrative is easy enough to follow, the characters are likable, and the world-building was wonderful! It reminds me a lot of David Eddings' and Brandon Sanderson's works!

I also caught up with some movies that I deliberately missed because of bad reviews: Wrath of the Titans, The Immortals, and 300: Rise of the Empire. Titans was just plain awful in every conceivable angle while Immortals and Empire were serviceable enough - they were at least pretty. My main problem with the mythology in Titans and Immortals, though, was that the "twilight of the gods" was a Norse concept and not Greek. Can somebody just make a film about Ragnarok and be done with it?

Coincidentally, I saw Rise of an Empire last Thursday - exactly the anniversary of 9/11. Just the day before, Barrack Obama addressed the ISIS situation. It was then that I acknowledged (internally) that I am afraid, especially at the prospect of another world war (thinking about Russia and North Korea as well). While violent conflicts are par for the course of any fantasy epic in any medium, I don't think I'm prepared to handle such a situation if it hits close to home.

Gorgo and Artemisia were the best part of the movie!

While we're on the subject of fantasy and religion, I've always wondered what it said about me that I am now averse towards the magical and fantastic doctrines of organized religion but sold on anything with dragons, fairies, avatars, titans, and the like. Then again, fantasy doesn't force me to believe that wizards are real the same way that religions venerate their saints and prophets. Then again, I'm no atheist. I'd still like to believe in a powerful unknowable force that permeates the universe. Maybe that's why I haven't lost my sense of wonder? Or maybe they're not connected?

Anyway, I also had the pleasure of teaming up with Paolo and Denice, both members of the Geek Fight committee, at last Wednesday's Boho Quiz Night hosted by Jon (one of my usual quiz night teammates). We didn't win but it was a fun evening nonetheless. I got to participate in Paolo's impromptu mini trivia game at our table since he was showing us some of the questions he used before. As usual, if it's not related to fantasy and mythology (or comics), I'm useless.

In other news:
I went to my college friend Hanna's kid's baptism way up in Bulacan yesterday. It's always good to see the old gang, especially Tintin who's been based in Singapore for more than 5 years. Of course, I found something deplorable about the priest's sermon. It's the thing I hate most about religious doctrines: The divisiveness.

We tried to catch the livestream of the UAAP Cheerdance Competition on the road but eventually our feed was cut off just as it was getting interesting. And while the general Thomasian community is glad that the UST Salinggawi Dance Troupe finally made it back to the top 3, I'm glad they delivered a performance that I can get behind because the past few years have just been mediocre at best.

Weekly Ketchup 36 - Overcoming Depression?

Last Tuesday morning, while on the train to my office from the printer's (ie, not my usual daily routine), I was suddenly and unexpectedly overcome with an overwhelming sense of grief - for no apparent reason.

Every time I get this way, I just keep thinking to myself that it's a chemical imbalance and proceed to busy myself and do something - anything - to get out of that state because it's an awful place to be! Even daydream!

Of course, being stuck on that train meant I had nowhere else to go. Thankfully, I had my sunglasses on to hide any external manifestation of that inexplicable despair. But for some reason, I didn't have music blasting in my ears like I usually do (then again, that morning was not my routine).

And so I scrambled to find songs to play and hopefully drown out my unseen foe. It was then that I remembered a couple of things I wrote a while back: one, when I wondered why I'm suddenly allergic to being idle; and two, the wandering and wondering voices in my head (figuratively, of course; I'm not insane - yet).

As I calmed myself down, I began to wonder whether my interests in a variety of things, most recently my search for new comics to follow, and my entertaining these "voices" are my means of subduing or coping with this unseen enemy. My hypothesis is that in those moments of complete stillness, when I don't think or feel anything, that's when it strikes. Of course, I can't really confirm that since I didn't keep records of previous episodes and there's no way to test it conclusively moving forward since I am now aware of it.

If there is indeed a correlation between keeping my head busy and fighting off what I can only describe as an anxiety attack, then this blog is a liability. There is a certain catharsis about putting thoughts into words. It frees my head of clutter, which could either leave space for more vapid ramblings or, as I have now theorized, leave me open to irrational bouts of depression.

(As I write this, it occurs to me that something else might also be at work here. If it's just a random chemical imbalance as I rationalized, why is it so easy for me to stave off with various distractions?)

Outside of this brief episode, I did have a good week.
Or maybe I'm just overcome with distractions?

First of all, I finished Mistborn: The Final Empire. I liked it well enough.

Read a few more FREE comics from Kobo: Midnight Nation (didn't like; set up mysteries I couldn't care about) and Hunter Killer (didn't think I'd enjoy it but I did).

Started watching Legend of Korra season two. I have yet to make my mind whether I love it (the steam punk may have a lot to do with it but that's a carry over from season one) but I do think the conflict Korra had with her mentors in the first couple of episodes felt a little forced.

The alternate ending to How I Met Your Mother had been leaked ahead of the DVD release. I already shared my views on the matter but it's an interesting timing for me since I just saw this video a few days ago and I thought it was pretty spot on. It's from a channel I subscribed to not too long ago but not in time to catch this as it went live.

Lastly: I went to Geek Fight after a long while along with my usual teammates and placed second. We're pretty split actually as a bunch of us were also in Amici for the monthly quiz night there (they won). We could've won but there were so many instances when someone had the answer but was unsure and someone else would suggest another answer and it would turn out the previous answer was already correct.

So that's my week. Hoping for a good week ahead!

Weekly Ketchup 35 - Comics and 4DX!

I had a completely different idea about how this past week was gonna unfold and what this blog was gonna be about. When I said last week that I was gonna have something more coherent for this week, it was because I expected that, by this time, I've already seen 9 Works Theatrical's staging of "The Last Five Years" and gotten sized up for a costume I was gonna wear as a member of Enchantment Ph's Disney cosplay group in time for CosplayMania.

Well, life happened. Tickets to this weekend's show were sold out and it's the last one. And, as it turned out, Enchantment Ph wasn't gonna be at CosplayMania. So why bother?

While neither is a complete loss (I mean, I can live without either), I was really looking forward to them. For pretty much the entire year, I've been shaving off some of my regular activities and declining events for the purposes of saving money, so it was kind of a big deal for me that I got excited about the show and cosplaying enough that I considered dipping into my savings. It's musical theater and Disney after all!

Thankfully, I have other interests and this week I had some time to delve into my comics-adled self.

For starters, I spent a great deal of the week going through Comixology, the Google Play Store, and Kobo looking for new worlds to discover and explore. I've been actually doing it for months and so far the only viable DRM-free digital platform (similar to Kobo, CD Baby, and GOG.com) is ImageComics.com, which obviously narrows down my choices to those offered by that publisher. Comixology's recently unveiled DRM-Free backups, however, has opened my choices up to other publishers like Zenescope and Top Cow. Both companies offer free but DRM-locked #0 or #1 issues of their respective titles on Google Play (for Zenescope) and Kobo (for Top Cow) but, as much as they dabble in the fantasy genre, what little I've glimpsed of their universes in the past few months have so far failed to excite me.

I tried to broaden my horizon this past week by sampling some of Arcana Studios and Aspen's free offerings on Comixology. Both companies also dabble in the realm of fantasy but I just can't get past the DRM restrictions despite liking what I've seen. Some of Aspen's titles are also available DRM-Free from DriveThruComics. If the site can just sign more publishers up and offer more file formats, I feel like the company will be my go-to site for digital comics but at the moment I'm only test-driving their services by availing some free issues.

Pretty impressive list of publishers already

That being said, allow me to deviate from the topic of digital distribution to the actual content that these publishers offer, especially as it relates to the recent controversy surrounding Milo Manara's variant cover to Spider-Woman no. 1. I feel like some of the anger towards Manara is unfounded considering that drawing women in provocative poses is what he's known to do. I think the problem really is that Marvel commissioned him to do this variant cover in the first place, which makes me wonder why this particular cover is gaining so much heat when this is just the latest in a long line of Manara-commissioned Marvel variants. My take is that, as much as it pains me to admit this in 2014, there is still a segment of the market that gets off on sexified women in comics and, I guess, this is a variant cover to attract that market. Nobody has to buy it - the regular cover is just fine and I'm sure the rest of the actual story in the issue puts Jessica Drew (one of my all-time favorite Avengers, by the way) in very good light.

Which brings me back to the publishers I mentioned above. With the exception of Image Comics (whose 90s incarnation had so much to atone for), it's hard for me to take their titles seriously because just look at these. I'm probably being unfair as I'm sure their comics is brilliantly written if I really give them a chance but the prevalent imagery in their books sure looks like they're intended for a particular market.

There is, however, a shining beacon in the form of Dynamite, which is one of the publishers that are part of Comixology's DRM-Free back-up program. They also recently launched their own DRM-Free digital comics store, though their selection is not that extensive yet. With luck, they become as viable as Image Comics come Cyber Monday later this year and offer up their entire back catalog at a discount because I've perused their titles and I'm already interested in quite a few. when Comixology's DRM-free back up program was launched a few weeks ago, I sampled Project Super Powers with a couple of free zero issues and I'm in! I want to read the entire thing! I've also been thinking about Masks and King's Watch for a while now (they're like the Justice League and the Avengers but with pulp characters), so I'm looking forward to those. I just tried Kirby Genesis today via the free zero issue and I'm also game but, for some reason, the DRM-Free back-up isn't available. The series is currently on sale on Comixology but until I'm certain of the DRM-free back up, it's a no-go for me.

The best thing about these titles is that they're finite miniseries, so the stories draw to a close instead of goes on (much like Watchmen) so there's no need for me to follow them for years on end. Which brings me to another title I'm attraced to: George Perez's upcoming 6-issue miniseries Sirens. Remember last week when I said I've been daydreaming about Avengers stories? Well, one of those was an all-female Avengers squad and this lineup looks a lot like the one I have in my head. I see the Wasp, Scarlet Witch, Black Widow, Jocasta, She-Hulk. Obviously, that's not them but I wouldn't be surprised if these characters are Perez's analogues to Earth's Mightiest Heroines. Boom! Studios, this comics' publisher, currently doesn't offer any DRM-free digital comics, nor is it part of Comixology's backup program so I might just pick up the physical copy or wait for the trade paperback.

See how different the women in this cover is.

Lastly, there is another comic I'm currently interested in, mainly because of last night's new experience. Pacific Rim: Tales from Year Zero is on Comixology but is neither DRM-Free nor on sale. Unfortunately, it's also not available on Google Play or Kobo. I might have to scour the world for a physical copy, hopefully on sale. And, yes, I'm only interested in it because I just saw Pacific Rim last night with a bunch of friends. I didn't see it when it came out last year because the premise just didn't tickle my fancy. It was just another CGI-laden summer blockbuster as far as I was concerned. But, having finally seen it, in 4DX no less - I find that the movie actually did something not even the Marvel movies could do: elicit a physical reaction from me in the theater that doesn't involve laughing (or crying for that matter). I was literally at the edge of my seat grabbing hold of my armrest and clenching my jaw as the jaegers and kaijus duked it out. It was definitely an intense experience.

As much as I enjoyed 4DX, though, I don't think any amount of special atmospheric effect is going to save a bad movie (*cough*Bayformers*cough*). I'd like to see another 4DX movie again as long as I know the movie's good to begin with, though I can't imagine what other movie would be perfect for this format? Gravity, perhaps?

Oh, and just to connect the movie to something I said a few paragraphs ago, gratuitousness goes both ways in 2014 and I think the filmmakers knew what they were doing when they hired Charlie Hunnam for the movie.

It looks like I ended the week on a pretty high note, despite the disappointments, so I'd like to think it's still a good week!

Weekly Ketchup 34 - General Updates and Addenda

Lest my current work problems turn into a three-episode arc, I'm just gonna append the experience of the past few weeks with a simple "things had a way of working themselves out". So, yeah, I'm slowly creeping back to my hopeful self.

Thankfully, the rest of the week passed without much fanfare, which brings me to the subject of this week's blog: What to write about? I thought I'd take this opportunity to share some thoughts that have been buzzing around in my head for a while now. These are mostly ramblings that were in drafts of earlier entries but had to be cut off because the blogs were getting too long. Either that or there just hadn't been an impetus to share them in a given week. Until now.

Changing Social Behavior

A couple of weeks ago, I ran this list of geeky distractions. What didn't make the cut of that rather long blog was the behind-the-scenes dilemma I had throughout that entire week about whether I should share the movie, music, book, or game I've been checking out. In real time. On all my social networks.

The thing was that I didn't want this blog to be a curation of what I've been sharing on social media the past week. I didn't want it to be like an extended edition of what I've already shared. That's just too much time sharing, opining, and talking about the same set of subjects.

And so I resolved to keep quiet about my new interests until I can blog about them. It's not in real time and I don't even get a lot of views but I do get to archive my thoughts, which is why I still prefer blogging in long form as opposed to sharing random bursts of opinion or activity.

Waging A Silent War

One of the earliest entries on this series was about random thoughts I had while walking home from work. In another blog not too long ago, I briefly mentioned how jeepneys have never been part of my reality. I'm aware that they're there and I do take them on occasion, especially late at night when buses and trains are no longer available but, until the Manila bus ban, I've never had to take them on a daily basis.

These past few months I've devised ways to cope with my current predicament. One way, as one might guess, was that I've been walking home. Thankfully, the distance between my house and office isn't all that great and I could use the bit of exercise given my sedentary lifestyle.

Another way I've been dealing, especially in the morning on my way to work, is holding on to my payment until I'm near the office and satisfied with the journey. Because the worst part about taking these piles of scrap metal are smoking drivers, everytime a driver lights a stick, I get off - without paying - and transfer to another jeep. I will also transfer if the driver plays really loud awful music. I realize that this sounds cruel but as a consumer, I need to get this satisfaction from a service I'm paying for.

Consumer vs Creator

Another earlier post was how everything seems to be accessible online now, which has been rather good for me since I got to open myself up to new and even old books, games, and comics.

Not too long ago I also wrote about some first world problems I had during a recent storm that took out our power and Internet. What I cut from that entry was my hypothesis that I was much more creative and imaginative back when I didn't have much access to anything. I remember one stormy and blacked out day when I came up with an entire X-books crossover. At the time, there was nothing else to do and I also didn't read many X-men comics because I couldn't afford them.

In all my years as an Avengers fan, most of which time I've been able to afford everything, I've never once imagined a single storyline, let alone an entire crossover epic.  However, recently, now that I'm not following the comics (not because I can't afford them, rather because they weren't coming up with the type of stories I want to read), I've been daydreaming about fantasy story arcs I want to see! I even like launching a fan fiction series - but I would still like for it to be graphic, even if I'm not an artist. I just gotta iron out the story!

I shared this on my Instagram a few months ago.
I actually imagined a war game back when I could only fantasize about playing one.

That's just three of the most badly written ramblings ever but I do enjoy putting my thoughts into words, however haphazardly, otherwise they would just fester in my head. That being said, I'm looking forward to a more coherent blog next week!

Oh, and this blog was delayed because of two very important people:

Yesterday, I was recovering from a party we had the night before to celebrate geek friend Hank's birthday!

Photo from Lynn's Facebook

Earlier today, I was at lunch to celebrate the birthday of another geek friend, Carlo!

I'm sure there's a better photo somewhere but this will do for now.
From Tania's Facebook

Weekly Ketchup 33 - I Just Need A Win

Remember last week's pop culture distractions from a rather stressful work situation? Well, here's the follow-up: As much as I know I'm doing the right thing, educating the client and going against orders, I realized a few days ago that I also screwed up. And we're already going into print! While the client didn't notice the mistake yet, I need to find a way to rectify the situation before they do! I already have an idea about what to do but it's gonna be expensive. FUCK!

The truth is that this isn't the first time that this has happened. Back in my previous agency, we've also made a couple of really expensive mistakes. Yeah, small details that tend to be overlooked can be extremely costly for the agency or the creative director whose job it was to make sure details down to the minute level are well accounted for. I've even gotten fired from a couple of non-advertising jobs for missing mistakes that should have been spotted during proofing.

All this time I thought I've gotten better a this sort of thing but obviously not. Apologies if I'm keeping the details a little vague because it's really boring to have to explain. Bottom line is that I screwed up and I've been bummed about it this past week. I'm afraid of how much it's going to cost me considering I've been saving up and also leaving. I'm afraid of having to convince the printer to stop production so I can fix my mistake, which we thankfully have time for (at least). More importantly, I'm afraid of what this experience might mean to my future job prospects.

I've been reminding myself that this ordeal is just a job and it's not the end of the world. It won't even matter in a year's time. Take it as a lesson learned. This was all supposed to be just "plan b", remember?

And yet, up until yesterday, this matter has weighed heavily on my mind that I couldn't bring myself to do anything else. I wanted to take this weekend to get started on a few other projects but that didn't happen. Instead, I laid in bed punishing myself mentally for my incompetence.

Adding to my already paralyzing frustration this past week was Warlords Battlecry 2, which I've been playing to distract my thoughts from the situation. The problem was that I kept losing and it's really bruising my already wounded ego!

I really just needed one win this past week.
It doesn't help that Robin Williams also died this past week.
I mean, celebrities die all the time but this one really hit. He is, after all, one of the prominent figures I knew growing up. I also followed "The Crazy Ones" (wouldn't you know it, a show about my industry) this past year and was saddened that it was cancelled. I just couldn't help myself - I was tearing up this entire week just looking at tribute art like this one:

Credit to the artist

Late afternoon yesterday, after realizing I won't get anything done unless I get a win, I finally got up from bed and fired up Warlords Battlecry 2. I played that thing over and over again until, finally, around 11pm, I got my win! I finally conquered that region that has been denied me this entire week!

Man, I just needed that sense of satisfaction. Went to sleep a little peacefully last night and woke up feeling less lousy earlier today. I even got to do some work that I've been neglecting these past few weeks.

Hopefully, the rest of the week won't be so bad.

See the green banners and castles? Those are mine.
The castle at the lower left, at the bottom of my empire is my hardest won territory yet.

Weekly Ketchup 32 - Geekstractions

This past week, I've been trying to distract myself from thinking about a possible confrontation with a client. Remember the campaign I mentioned here and the photo shoot I discussed here? Yeah, it's that client.

The short version, though, is that this client doesn't seem to get that the moment a digital proof of the layout we sent their printer is provided, then that means they're ready to go to print. This client also seems to have it in their heads that we speak for their printer along with some other expectations that we, as an agency, never offered. This situation bothers me so much that I'm constantly imagining the confrontation with the client. I suppose it's because I really can't be angry or annoyed towards the client however much I'd like to use expletives, hence I let the confrontation linger in my fantasies. But it's taken up so much of my free time that I just want release! The argument did happen last Friday though and I'm a bit proud of myself for holding my ground. I tried to be less argumentative or aggressive about it and tried to educate the client about the standard process that agencies and printers follow.

This all that either the printer or the agency should see on the digital proof

Anyway, as of this writing, the saga continues and my head is still swimming with negative scenarios, which brings me back to distractions. This past week, I've been trying out new comics, movies, and books - anything just to pass the time without imagining the screaming match I really want to have with the client.

I started the week finally reading my digital copy of "Rat Queens" that I got from the Image sale a few weeks back. It's a fantasy so it's obviously a prime pick for me and I enjoyed it immensely. I really wish there was more to read with each issue though. Like I said during my quick review of "Invincible", I really miss the days when comics would take at least 15 minutes to read.

I also got into "Real Heroes" mainly because it was free. It's basically "Galaxy Quest" but with superheroes. It's an interesting book, especially given the popularity of the Marvel Cinematic Universe, which was primarily based on the Ultimate universe. The connection, of course, was that "Real Heroes" creators Mark Millar and Bryan Hitch were the same team behind "The Ultimates".

On the movie front, I downloaded the Justice League animated movies "Doom", "Flashpoint Paradox", "War", and "Trapped in Time" and watched them one after another. I could just be asking for too much here (I know there's a current animated show and the live action films are kicking butts) but why can't Marvel come up with animated movies that are just as decent? I'd still really like a nice animated Avengers movie!

The past week, I also got a copy of the "If/Then" soundtrack, which means I'm now drowning in Idina Menzel after "Rent", "Wicked", and "Frozen". It's hard to appreciate the songs without context but I still enjoy them. It's nice to hear Anthony Rapp's voice again, though LaChanze's has matured since I first heard her on "Once on this Island". Anyway, I'd really like to see a staging of the show. It'd be interesting to see how they switch from one reality to another.

I also got a copy of Matchbox 20's "North" and the Green Day trilogy "Uno", "Dos", "Tre" albums. Both bands were holdovers from my music taste in the 1990s and I still enjoy their new material. Though admittedlying, I haven't listened to them as much as the "If/Then" soundtrack.

Finally, I got started on Brandon Sanderson's "Mistborn". I'm only a few chapters in and, in true Sanderson fashion, the pace is really quick and there's a lot of dialog to establish the world, which is always preferable as far as I'm concerned. I haven't read much about the series so I don't really know where the story is headed but my body is ready.

Other than that, I've been playing my games from GOG.com and Android. And just last Sunday, I went through all three Toy Story DVDs back to back. I thought I'd be immune by now, knowing how the trilogy ends, but no, I still had that moment when I was wiping tears and snot from my face.

Social interactions also help. Last Thursday was Amici Quiz Night and we lost despite there being a battalion of us. There was a Guardians of the Galaxy category though, which I mostly answered correctly. I was able to supply the names of Steve Gan and Bill Mantlo only because their names were on my news feed since the movie became popular.

And we celebrated high school friend Anya's birthday last night, which is why this blog is delayed by a day. I love getting together with the people who've known me the longest even if we're in different points in our lives. After all the catching up and reminiscing, we ended up talking about "Game of Thrones". Anya also said she read "Wolverine Origins" except the last issue, which is frustrating her because she wants to know what happened.

Hopefully, I hope this situation with the client gets sorted out this week. Or maybe just writing about it will give me the release I need. If not, well, at least I have all these things to geek out over!

Weekly Ketchup 31 - Aliens

The past couple of days, my social media activities have largely been about "Documented" and "Guardians of the Galaxy". One would think these two things couldn't be farther apart from each other but, well, I always find a connection.

Earlier this week, I found out that "Documented" was gonna be screening at the CCP as part of the opening festivities of the Cinemalaya Film Festival. I made the effort to catch it last Friday, though I had to take some time off work to do so, because Jose Antonio Vargas' story appeals to me on so many level. For one thing, I was an undocumented American citizen for about 16 years here in the Philippines and a couple of years in Canada, which is a story I've already discussed in a previous blog a couple of years ago. Like Vargas, my mom also sent me to board a plane with a stranger to go live with my grandparents.

However, the parallelism in our stories end there. For one thing, I'm not ever going to fight to gain citizenship to this country. But the irony is that I already do have a sort of citizenship thanks to my certificate of recognition, which actually makes me a citizen of the country in all but passport. This means that I can pay my taxes to this country (big whoop that turned out to be) and claim any benefits entitled to any taxpayer. I have been paying my dues since I started working and made my claim once, so that turned out pretty well. Vargas, though, has been paying his taxes in the US as well, even if he's not supposed to be there, but he won't be eligible to the benefits, which seems rather unfair.

The biggest difference between our stories is that I didn't end up separated from my mom or my dad or my siblings (yes, those are three separate entities as far as my sordid family history is concerned). And, unlike Vargas, I've actually experienced being deported - to the States.

I'm not sure if I knew anything at all of immigration laws back when I was a kid but I already knew the term "illegal alien" because my grandmother told me, more than once growing up, that I was one. And now that I think about it, it's strange that everyone in our little town seemed to know that they were basically harboring a fugitive like it was some sort of open secret. Was the country lax in implementing laws even then? Or was I sent to the province specifically to avoid the enforcers in Manila? I could ask but why bother. That time is done.

What I want answered now is whether it's fair that Vargas, whose contribution to the United States far outweighs mine, will never get the same opportunities available to me simply because I was born there. Just this past week, I was reminded to update my voter registration because there's a primary election happening in November. It feels like cheating, especially since I also share the opinion that, at least as far this country's electoral system is concerned, only the taxpayers should get to vote. That reminds me: I always tell people that I can't vote in Philippine elections because of my citizenship but I never conclusively figured out whether my recognition status covered that aspect of civic responsibility. I suppose I can still ask around.

Now, on to this week's other alien matter: "Guardians of the Galaxy"! There's not much else I can add to my barrage of posts yesterday, except maybe the big shocker that I wasn't really hyped up about the movie going into it. I did mention in my X-men blog that I feel like the Marvel Studios film universe is an obligation rather than a genuine interest. These Guardians aren't even characters I care so much about because like any fanboy of the old guard, these are still my Guardians of the Galaxy:

Still, the film is a triumph of genre storytelling. It's a comic book movie, to be sure, but it's clearly  not a superhero story. It's also the perfect example of how a simple plot wins in the execution. That being said, I'm not sure I agree with critics and fans who say that GotG is better than The Winter Soldier, which remains my favorite MCU film to date. And even then, Days of Future Past is still my favorite comic book movie of the year.

Of course, not everything about this past week was about aliens. Last Wednesday, I participated in Boho's quiz night / fundraiser hosted by geek friend Jon. I formed a team with UST batchmate/Geek Fight Committee member Denice and Mark Escay. We didn't win but hey! We had mojitos all around plus a screening of Robin Hood: Men In Tights! We even played a game of Cards Against Humanity with some of the Boho regulars, some of whom turned out to be Thomasians! I also caught up with Shin, an acquaintance I met through Dek, who I haven't seen or heard from in a long time. He invited to return last Friday but, well, "Documented" happened. I had a good time that night. I woke up late for work the next day and was so tired that I didn't catch GotG on opening day but I had a good time!

Funny thing about the Thomasians, though, was that Denice and I were just talking about how our old ID photos were stored on a server because we were able to retrieve it a few years before. The very next day, it was all over social media again. Not sure why but, well, I participated anyway.

Oh, and one last thing: It's my mom's birthday today so yay! Ice cream!

Weekly Ketchup 30 - Comic Con, Geek Life, and the Last Two Years

This week was pretty much about all the nerd news coming out of San Diego Comic Con. It's always an exciting time for the geek community, although there is that element of despair at not being there yourself, which brings me to the first thing I want to address about the past week.

I've always wondered about the average 50 hits that these blog entries receive every week. Like, who the hell is reading them? Don't get me wrong, I love the attention but it makes me wonder if I should be cautious about the things I put in here, which I am as long it doesn't compromise honesty.

Who are you?!

The reason I mention this is because apparently geek friend Jovan had strong hard-to-articulate feelings about something she read a couple of entries ago. She mentioned it to me last week but we only got to talking about it last Friday over drinks with fellow geeks Hec and Alec, who also celebrated his birthday this past week.

I mentioned in the blog how the past couple of years have just been this kind of lull, like a television series that was a couple of seasons too long for its own good. And her question was: What did that make of the people around me? The friends that I keep? And what did my sentiments mean for her when she's okay with the steady flow of things going on in her story?

Me and my friends saw The Avengers

This is how all this personal matter connect to SDCC: Had things worked out the way they were supposed to, I would've been at Comic Con this year. Or at least closer to it (I heard those tickets can be hard to come by). The thing is that I already left in 2011 but I felt like my story here wasn't done yet, so I chose to come back (my auntie and my mom wanted me to stay there). By 2012, after the first Avengers movie, which I really wanted to see with the geek friends, I was already good to go but was holding out on money that, as it turned out, I wasn't gonna get after all. So come 2013, when the opportunity presented itself again, I thought that was it. Like in 2011, I was supposed to bring my grandma home to Canada, but the difference was that I wasn't gonna book a flight back. I had already saved up enough money to start over and I wouldn't have had to pay for the plane ticket so I thought I was all set! I started posting "throwback" photos on Instagram of my last trip to the States as a tease and even declared that "this exiled Targaryen is returning to Westeros". And, yeah, I already signed up to the Comic Con website in preparation for this year's event, which I knew even then would assemble the cast of Age of Ultron (Which isn't to say that I want to leave just so I can attend SDCC. I'm just saying last year would've been the best time for me to have left).

Obviously, things didn't work out the way they were supposed to last year, otherwise I'd have been live-tweeting from Hall H a few hours ago, instead of retweeting and sharing the news from other sources who were on the scene as the cast of Ant-Man and Age of Ultron drummed up support (like they need it) and hype for next year's Marvel Studios slate.

I took this photo in an alternate reality

By the way, I just started watching The Newsroom this past week during periods of no Internet at the office and I gotta say it's effin' brilliant. And me being me, I felt like I was in a virtual newsroom while covering all the major announcements coming from Marvel Studios earlier. I even heard myself saying in my head: "Do we have anyone on the ground at Hall H?

Another segue: I should be pissed. I should nerd-rage. The Ant-Man movie, as announced earlier, reimagines the mythology of the character to almost beyond recognition. Ultron and The Vision wouldn't even be part of their universe. But I'm not even upset because the movie is just a movie. It's just a fraction, though a significant one at that, of the myriad of ways I can appreciate and experience Hank Pym, Scott Lang, Janet Van Dyne, Yellowjacket, and their little world. It would've been great if they stayed true to the material but I'm over it.

One thing I'm not gonna get over if it turns out to be true is the absence of Arianne Martell on Game of Thrones. New cast members of the show were announced this past week and her name still hasn't popped up. I mentioned in a previous blog that her and the Greyjoys were among the new characters I'm looking forward to seeing on the show, but it's beginning to look like they've been cut or maybe just not appearing yet next season. Of course, this is all just speculation.

Surprised that Rose Leslie and Pedro Pascal still made an appearance.

Now, to address Jovan's questions (and I don't know how to say this without alienating my other friends from other circles who might be reading this blog), my geek friends are the only reasons I would ever consider staying (I mentioned as much in that article I wrote about Manila) and they're the reason why I stayed as long as I have (more than lack of funding). Yeah, leaving has been on my mind for a while already - even longer than these past couple of years actually. As early as 2008, on one of those "getting-to-know-you" memes that went around Multiply, I said that had I left when I should have a long time ago, I never would've had the pleasure of their company and while nothing has changed that would make leaving them any easier now, I feel like our relationship has grown to the level that I can check in every now and then or come back and it'd be like I never left at all. Hey, it worked out well for Hec, Alec, and, to some extent, Dek, even if she hasn't come back yet. And with many of them getting married, having children, moving to new houses, and just moving on to the next stage of their lives, I feel like it's time to pursue the next chapter of my story. Like I said in a previous blog, I already know what I'm leaving behind and I'm grateful but it's time for me to unravel the unknown ahead.

As for what it means that she's content with the way things are in her life, well, considering the mess she often has to deal with, I think a little security and stability for long periods might be good for her. And since we've also established some time ago that we're not compatible travel partners (she prefers to stay in and relax; I prefer to go out and stress myself trying to take everything in at once), maybe we also differ with how we approach contentment. While she relishes in it, preferring to stay in for as long as she can, I am itching to get out and see everything else as soon as I'm settled. Of course, I can't speak for her. Again, these are all speculations.

It's so beautiful I want to cry!

Anyway, hopefully, next year I would be reporting/tweeting live from San Diego, but I want to reaffirm a vow I once made on social media that the first time I attend SDCC would be as a panelist, volunteer, or booth... babe. What? A guy can dream!