2014/04/27

Weekly Ketchup 17 - Declining Invitations

I have this thing where I decline invitations to travel to places I've already visited, watch movies I've already seen, read books I've already finished, you get the drill.

I kid you not. I declined an invitation for a Boracay trip a couple or so years ago because I've already been there with pretty much the same people. Except for The Avengers and the first Captain America movie, I have never seen any of the MCU films more than once. I tried to re-read the Wheel of Time series in preparation for the final book and gave up. I could say that I feel sentimental about the initial experience but nah - I just always feel like I could be doing something else or something new with my time and money, rather than repeat a previous experience.

The reason I bring this up is because immediately after La Union, Urim wants to organize a trip to Baguio, which I already told him I'm not particularly inclined to visit since I've been there twice in my lifetime. I said I'd rather go to Sagada!

Similarly I've been declining invitations for quiz nights and game nights, though they are staple activities for me and my friends, these past few months in favor of gaming by myself or working on creative endeavors, personal projects, etc.

Just this weekend, I thought I would be working on a client's website but I didn't receive the necessary files, so I pretty much had a free weekend. The thing is I've been invited to a Pinoy 501st Legion trooping and a gaming day with an acquaintance from Plurk, both of which I declined because I thought I would be working. I didn't bother to revise my plans because I realized I would be pretty busy with the same set of friends next weekend. I elected to stay home instead and advance in one of the games I sampled last weekend:

Dust: An Elysian Tail
It's the first game that I tried from that batch and I fell in love with it instantly!
It's gorgeous and I love that I can just mash buttons together and voila! Lights, colors, action, blaze, dazzle!
Win! It's amazing!
As much as I want to be that guy who is always free and present at practically every event, I realized that I also have to be selective with my time, else I won't have much for other experiences. Of course, I will always be present for the big ones, birthdays for example.

Just this past week, Alec organized a surprise birthday party for Jon and it was epic - the organizing part, that is. We pretty much had a clear idea of how we were gonna pull it off. We had venue, time, motive, etc.

And then Jon invited us all to dinner at his place.

The past couple of days prior to the surprise were pretty stressful for Alec and Paul, who scrambled to keep things together even as Jon changed his plans. It all worked out in the end though. We got to surprise Jon at his place and at Boho. And a good time was had by all.

Look how happy he is!
See, I want to be present for times like these, and not just in the physical sense. I don't ever want to be that person whose body is at a gathering but whose mind is elsewhere, which happens a lot to me. I'd agree to a meet-up, only to silently count the hours and see if there's enough time for what I really wanted to do when I got back home. And that's not cool.

Case in point: I was just at Rocky and Tobie's earlier to pick up Rocky's tablet, which he graciously lent me so I can read the Invincible issues he got on sale from Comixology. Yes, old school physical lending still works on digital issues. Boo, DRM! Anyway, the guys offered to run a game of Cosmic Encounter with me and a couple of their friends. I was waiting for the sun to go down anyway (it was scorching), so I stayed and played. And sucked.


But I declined a second game because I still wanted to blog, which is just as important to me, plus I didn't want to miss the train home. If I stayed, I'd be tap-tap-tapping on my phone, with no focus on the game or what I'm writing, which would've been a bigger waste of time. Funny enough: Rocky had the same dilemma with his blog as we were setting up Cosmic Encounter.

Bottom line: If I'm going to balance making time for friends and catching up on experiences, both of which I covered on the same blog earlier this year, then I am going to have to decline some invitations, especially repetitive ones. And I feel like I'm in that stage of my relationship with friends where I can be honest about these things, which is great!

FYI: Invincible is one of those new universes that I've been meaning to explore now that I'm no longer following The Avengers. And it's likely that in the next few weeks, the reason I would decline any invitation is because I would rather read.

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